God is real. He has meatballs. I have proof.
Brothers and sisters, behold the Flying Spaghetti Monster in all his glory:
Now behold the professional network of Ali Imam, Senior Data Scientist at LinkedIn:
Now lets look at it again, with CLEAR eyes:
Is that not three of HIS Meatballs linked by delicious Al Dente Spaghetti? The truth is undeniable, once you see it.
And once you see it once… you can’t stop seeing it everywhere. His Noodly Appendage makes appearances at developer conferences:
He appears in random data:
And in biological data:
Regardless of the problem domain, all these graphs look identical! Indeed… the face of god emerges from every kind of force directed graph, thus proving HIS existence. Every graph shows us the face of god.
Lets look at what the OTHER guy has to offer… the Jesus toast:
Dare I say that there is no science there? That given millions of toasts consumed by millions of people every day, that surely Jesus’ face must emerge on many, every single day? The toast is not statistically significant.
The ordained among the data-driven pastafarians, ‘data scientists,’ must apply more rigor than toast curation in their study of the universe. We are not simpletons. We will not worship toast. We worship data, where the face of god is manifest in such great frequency that His Word cannot be doubted.
A formal proof of this theorem is so elementary that it is left as an exercise to the reader.